Friday, November 5, 2010

The FOX pregame team spends 10 percent of its show laughing

According to a study by The Wall Street Journal, the panels on network NFL pregame shows can spend over 10 percent of their airtime engaging in fits of collective laughter.

An analysis of the Week 5 pregame programs showed that Terry Bradshaw, Jimmy Johnson, Howie Long, Curt Menefee and Michael Strahan(notes) of FOX spent two minutes, 22 seconds laughing together during their 20 minutes on air. That was more than triple the amount of time spent laughing by the CBS crew of Bill Cowher, Boomer Esiason, Greg Gumbel, Dan Marino and Shannon Sharpe, who clocked in at a meager 43 seconds. 

FOX beat CBS in forced laughter? That's a monumental upset on the scale of The Miracle on Ice, Appalachian State over Michigan or Rocky knocking out Drago. I know Terry Bradshaw is bad (he laughed for 92 seconds during the show), but the team of Marino, Sharpe and Esiason are like a murderer's row of phony laughers. I'd have guaranteed that they were more prone to bursts of contrived guffaws. Just listen to them: 

(Yes, that's from a different year, but you get the gist.)

I'm going to call Week 5 a statistical outlier and implore The Wall Street Journal to look at more data before coming to any conclusion. I'd do it myself, but that would mean I'd have to watch both the FOX and CBS pregame shows and I don't know if I'm emotionally able to make that sacrifice.

Laron Landry-like handshake to PFT

Related: Michael Strahan


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Thursday, November 4, 2010

Tennessee Titans claim Randy Moss off waivers

Randy Moss(notes) will be taking his talents to Nashville.

Despite his lack of production, boorish behavior and the fact that his on- and off-field antics forced two teams to part ways with him in the span of 26 days, Moss was deemed an acceptable risk for Jeff Fisher and the Titans, who claimed the receiver off waivers late Wednesday afternoon. Jim Wyatt of The Tennessean was first to report the news.

[Photos: Latest images of Randy Moss]

Tennessee was No. 22 on the NFL's waiver order (which goes from worst record to best), meaning 21 other teams passed on the chance to bring Moss onto their team. 

In Tennessee, Moss will join Vince Young(notes) and a decimated receiving corps that just lost last week's breakout star, Kenny Britt(notes), to a minor injury. The Titans will pick up the remainder of Moss' $6.4 million contract, which expires at the end of the year.

Moss was cut on Monday by the Vikings after a tumultuous weekend that began with him insulting a restaurant owner during a team meal. In Sunday's loss to his former team, the New England Patriots, Moss quit on a play and then blasted coach Brad Childress in a bizarre, postgame press conference. The decision to waive him was made hours later, while Moss was still in Boston after reportedly demanding that he be allowed to stay in the city following the game. 

[Watch: Funny song tribute to Moss]

After his release, Moss was placed on waivers, where teams ranked in order of worst record had a chance to make a claim. Because he's viewed as a short-term rental, not a long-term investment, Moss was bypassed by teams with first dibs on him. The belief: There's no upside in bringing Moss to a rebuilding project. (This could explain why the St. Louis Rams, a team considered to be favored to land Moss, passed on him. Why ruin everything Steve Spagnuolo has spent the past two years building?)

His upside made him hard to resist for a team with playoff aspirations and a solid organizational structure like the Titans. It was always believed that the team willing to gamble on Moss would have to have a strong head coach, and there are few head coaches in the league better suited to handle a diva like Moss than Jeff Fisher.

The Titans have a bye this week. Moss should make his debut with the team in Miami on Nov. 14.

Other popular stories on Yahoo! Sports:
Notorious NBA trash-talker crosses the line
What Brett Favre looked like in high school
MLB champion Giants celebrate in San Francisco

Related: Kenny Britt, Randy Moss, Vince Young, New England Patriots, St. Louis Rams, Tennessee Titans


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Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Revis still the fastest ... just not on the field

In 2009, there may not have been a faster man on any NFL field (Chris Johnson excepted) than New York Jets cornerback Darrelle Revis(notes). Week after week, he took the game's biggest and best burners and shut them down completely. And though he is currently recovering from a hamstring injury that kept him off the field for two games and limited him last Monday night against the Vikings, Revis is still zooming by just about everyone else.

Problem is, he's now doing it on America's highways and byways.

According to the Associated Press, Revis was ticketed Friday morning for driving 80 mph in a 40-mph zone on the Eisenhower Parkway in New Jersey as he was on his way to a team meeting at the Jets' facilities. Revis was recognized by the officer who stopped him, but says that he will not fight the ticket.

"I mean, I'm not a speedster," Revis said. "I don't do that. I was a little late for work and I was just trying to get here to work. You face the consequences when you speed and that's what happens ... I'm a citizen, so I've got to follow the rules as well as everybody else."

Jets head coach Rex Ryan was not impressed by his star cornerback's new need for speed. "We can all take notice of it," Ryan told the media. "Obviously, you've got to slow down. He was running late, that's not an excuse. You'd hate to see him or anybody be careless where you put somebody else at risk, put yourself at risk, and that's a reminder for all of us."

Ryan had most likely figured out that most self-appointed moralists and ethical experts (yes, we mean you, Mr. Dungy) will tack this onto the team's eventful season off the field and use it as just another example of Ryan's inability to impose the people discipline. But -- and this is in no way excusing Revis putting himself and others in danger -- if Ryan really ran such a loose ship, why would Revis have been busting his butt trying to get to that meeting on time?

Revis is currently listed as questionable for the Jets' next contest in Denver. It will be Ryan's decision as to whether Revis plays (he was probably back too soon against the Vikings) against Kyle Orton(notes) and the NFL's most dynamic passing offense. We assume that others will handle the transportation to the Mile High City.

Related: , Darrelle Revis, Kyle Orton, New York Jets


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Redskins, Bears and the 'worst football game I've ever seen'

A small sampling of opinions from sports Twitterati on the ugly, turnover-filled battle of attrition between the Washington Redskins and Chicago Bears:

@dcsportsbog: "This might actually be the worst football game I've ever seen." (Dan Steinberg, The Washington Post)

@sportsguy33: "I'm not kidding -- this Redskins-Bears game is so bad that I think it just gave Troy Aikman a concussion. Is that possible?" (Bill Simmons, ESPN)

@chrismottram: "This is the ugliest, most bizzare organized football game I've ever seen." (Chris Mottram, SB Nation)

@andyhutchins: "Every single Redskins-Bears play has me giggling. This is both the best and worst football game ever." (Andy Hutchins, SB Nation)

@FO_BBarnwell: "Electric football looks more like the real thing than Bears-Redskins." (Bill Barnwell, Football Outsiders)

@chaztopher: "The first time the Bears and Redskins played they ended in a 7-7 tie in 1932. Suffice it to say, that game featured better offense." (Me)

Think we're overreacting? Take a look for yourself: 

The final tally: nine turnovers (six for Chicago, three for Washington), six sacks, a combined 17 percent conversion rate on third downs, multiple delay-of-game penalties; ugh, it was brutal. It says something about the NFC when these two teams were leading their respective divisions two weeks ago and are threats to make the playoffs.

Cutler shone the dullest, throwing four interceptions to DeAngelo Hall(notes), none of which were caused by much more than the quarterback's own incompetence. On the bright side, Bears fans can be happy that he made it through the game without spiking himself.

Washington ended up winning the game 17-14, although the 'Skins didn't "win" as much as they "lost less." 

Related: DeAngelo Hall, Chicago Bears, Washington Redskins


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Halloween in London: The end for Mike Singletary?

Before the 2010 season started, it was presented as a fait accompli that the San Francisco 49ers would win the NFC West. A dominant defense, the theory went, would propel an up-and-coming offense to the upper tiers of the league, and head coach Mike Singletary's motivational style would be the glue that held it all together. Of course, there was some concern about quarterback Alex Smith's development, but under the right circumstances, maybe this 49ers team could be a Super Bowl contender like the 2000 Baltimore Ravens and the 2007 New York Giants -- the defense and run game would lead the way, and the "game manager" quarterback would follow.

Needless to say, the 49ers have flipped the script. Their 1-6 record is the NFC's worst, and they have only themselves to blame -- the formerly winless Carolina Panthers got off the schneid against Singletary's team with a 23-20 win on Sunday. And that allegedly great defense was upended by the quarterback/receiver combo of Matt Moore(notes) and David Gettis(notes).

Singletary, who's always been about the big soundbite, tried to stay positive after the loss. "There's no doubt in my mind that somehow, someway, we will regroup and keep fighting," he said. "We will make a season of it. And I still believe we can go to the playoffs. I still believe we can get those things done. We just have to get the right things in place, and go from there."

That echoes the recent proclamation by team president/owner Jed York that the 49ers still had what it took to make a playoff run. But now, it's coming out that there are serious rumblings and grumblings about the job Singletary's doing. Team sources told Matt Maiocco of CSNBayArea.com that York and his father, John, have expressed displeasure about the coaching to their "inner circle."

Singletary was signed to a four-year contract after his interim performance in the 2008 season, but the 49ers are in a bit of a pickle here. It was thought that this season would finally erase the effects of years of bad hiring and personnel decisions, and the franchise is still trying to work out the logistics of a new stadium. Alex Smith is a free agent after this season, and it's quite possible that Singletary's tough-guy shtick has worn thin with his players. Having fired offensive coordinator Jimmy Raye and engaged in multiple sideline confrontations with Smith in the last few weeks, Singletary seems to be losing his grip on the team.

The 49ers travel to London this week; they're facing the Denver Broncos on Halloween night at Wembley Stadium. If they lose to the Broncos, who were just poleaxed by a Raiders team that provided San Francisco's only win this season, the subsequent bye week would give the Yorks the time they need to put a suitable replacement plan in place. And at 1-7, what else should they be doing?

Related: , Baltimore Ravens, Carolina Panthers, Denver Broncos, New York Giants, San Francisco 49ers


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Monday, November 1, 2010

Fake Jon Gruden breaks down Giants-Cowboys Monday nighter

Fake Jon Gruden breaks down the fantastic Monday Night Football matchup between the New York Giants and Dallas Cowboys:

On Eli Manning -- "Let me tell you, this guy is cool, calm and collected. That's why I call him 'The Cucumber.' He's a Super Bowl MVP and has the New York Giants leadin' the NFC East. He's like a hammer and the rest of the league is his rock." 

On Tony Romo(notes) -- (Gruden leans forward precariously on his stool, knuckles white from gripping the table so hard.) "You talk about Tony Romo; this guy is without a doubt one of the best quarterbacks in the National Football League. He's completin' 70 percent of his passes. It's so much fun to call plays when you have a guy at quarterback like this. You say, "can you run this play," and he'll say, "hey, I can do whatever you need." My kinda guy."

On Tom Coughlin -- "Hoo boy, this is one dude you don't wanna mess with. He's a tough cookie. An old-school disciplinarian. On time is too late for this guy! You've gotta show up five minutes early in Tom Coughlin's world! If you had to sum up the head coach of the New New York Football Giants in three words: Discipline. Poise. Order. Discipline."

On Jerry Jones -- "What an owner, one of the best in the history of sports. This new stadium is so amazin' that they call it the Palace in Dallas. You know, they're gonna have the Super Bowl here in February. And all Jerry Jones wants to do is get his Cowboys to that game. And you know what? I think he has the team this year to do it." 

On Miles Austin(notes) -- "Miles Austin isn't just one of the most underrated football players in the National Football League, he might also be one of the best. This guy can do it all. Run the go route. Block the C-gap. Go over the middle. Here's a young man who can penetrate and get into that spot. Nobody really talks about him but, believe me Jaws, he can play. Miles Austin is a true football player. I love that guy." (Note: But not as much as MJD.)

On Hakeem Nicks(notes) -- (Gruden emits a long whistle, as if to say, "that guy there is special.")

Related: Miles Austin, Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys, New York Giants


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How to be great and awful at the same time, by Norv Turner

It's not often that the same team has the league's best offense and the league's best defense. But, using total yards as our statistical guideline, the NFL currently has a team doing just that.

So who is this powerful juggernaut? Who's that lighting up the scoreboard, locking down opposing offenses and putting pants-wetting fear into the hearts of every overmatched team in the league?

Well, no one. Because the team that's dominating the statbook is the San Diego Chargers, and they're not very good. They scare no one, except for the guy in charge of counting how many times they fumble each week.

It's really quite amazing. The Chargers offense leads the NFL in yards per game, yards per play, first downs per game, passing yards, average yards per pass attempt, and passing first-down percentage.

Defensively, they're first in yards allowed per game, 20 yards better than anyone else. They give up 4.2 yards per play, also best in the league.

And here they sit at 2-5.

Why? Well, rather than tell you that they've lost 12 fumbles, their minus-7 turnover ratio is 31st in the league and that their special teams are broken in nearly every way, I think it's best if we highlight individual plays and instances from their season. Let's go through the list. I think you'll enjoy it if you hate the Chargers.

• Gave up a 94-yard punt return for a touchdown against Kansas City.

• Fumbled at their own 13-yard-line, resulting in a Kansas City touchdown three plays later.

• Gave up two kickoff returns for touchdowns in the same half, to the same guy, against Seattle.

• Turned the ball over five times against Seattle.

• Allowed the Raiders to block two of their punts, both in the first five minutes of the game, both resulting in Oakland scores.

• Fumbled at Oakland's 1-yard line.

• Fumbled again inside Oakland's red zone.

• Fumbled once again in Oakland territory, this one picked up by Oakland and returned for a touchdown.

• Had a field-goal attempt blocked against St. Louis. Kicker Nate Kaeding(notes) injured himself on the play.

• Turned the ball over against New England when receiver Richard Goodman(notes) caught a pass for a first down, set the ball on the ground and got up without having been touched by a defender.

• Turned the ball over again as Jacob Hester(notes) failed to pursue a backwards pass that was not completed.

• A potentially game-tying 45-yard field-goal attempt turned into a 50-yard field-goal attempt after a false start, which was then doinked off the upright.

And that's how you can dominate on both sides of the ball and still suck. This lesson has been brought to you by the 2010 San Diego Chargers.

Related: San Diego Chargers, People Not Doing a Great Job


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Seattle’s opportunism derails flailing Cardinals

SEATTLE, Wa. -- Seahawks head coach Pete Carroll called his team's 22-10 win over the Arizona Cardinals "interesting," but the real point of interest is a Seattle franchise that has made over 200 transactions this season, and somehow still stands at 4-2, atop the NFC West. They've already matched the win total for the pathetic 4-12 season of 2008; one more victory and they'll have matched 2009's total as well. Full-scale changes of this magnitude don't generally precede surprising win totals, but the Seahawks aren't focusing on the here and now. "It's great to get the win, and we had a lot of fun in the locker room about it, but we have so much room for improvement. Offensively, we ran the football okay; we're getting better. We probably lost 60 or 70 yards (on penalties) in this game, maybe that's not right, but it seemed like it on the couple of penalties on the edge that don't need to happen."

Carroll knows two things full well. First, that his team left at least three touchdowns on the field. Second, these are not your big brother's Arizona Cardinals.

If anyone out there still questions the Hall of Fame credentials of one Kurt Warner(notes), a quick glance at the post-Warner version of the Cards should put that to rest. After Warner's retirement following the 2009 season, head coach Ken Whisenhunt was left with a grab-bag of signal callers in two different categories: underperforming veteran mediocrities (Matt Leinart(notes), Derek Anderson(notes)) and rookies for whom, as the Doors once sang, "the future's uncertain, and the end is always near" (John Skelton(notes), Max Hall(notes)). Leinart played his way off the team, Anderson played his way onto the bench, and Hall, an undrafted free agent from BYU most famous for being the nephew of former Dallas Cowboys quarterback Danny White, climbed his way up from fourth on the depth chart to get his first start last week against the New Orleans Saints. Beating the world champs was a thrill, but the unfriendly confines of Seattle's Qwest Field and a Seahawks defense more than ready for anything Hall threw at it combined to perplex Hall beyond any chance of victory.

Hall finished his game with four completions on 16 attempts for 36 yards, and interception, and a quarterback rating of 13.5 before he was pulled in the third quarter following a head hit from defensive end Chris Clemons. Seattle's defenders deflected or defenses at least five of Hall's passes, with rookie Walter Thurmond(notes) (who started for the injured Kelly Jennings(notes)) making his case against a team that could only complete short stuff against him. Anderson replaced Hall and started out hot, completing his first four passes and then falling apart when he was forced to play catch-up, finishing 8 of 17 for 96 yards.

Not that Seattle's offense was that much more effective - especially in the red zone - but defense and special teams stepped up once again in ways that have been unfamiliar in recent years. Arizona fumbled four times and lost all four, and two return fumbles had the Seahawks starting drives on the Cardinals' 11- and 16-yard lines. On those two drives, Seattle lost 17 yards on six plays, predominantly on a befuddling series of penalties that began with 11:09 left in the third quarter. Tight end Cameron Morrah(notes) was busted twice on consecutive plays by referee Jeff Triplette's crew for holding, taking the ball from the Arizona 13-yard line to the 33. Kicker Olindo Mare(notes), who actually made nine field goals in his game, had to be content with the fact that only five of them counted due to various penalties.

Arizona's defense could take some credit for those stops. "We have a little something about trying not to give them six points, give them three, try to keep them out, especially in the red zone. We kind of take pride in that," defensive tackle Alan Branch(notes) said.

But as Arizona nose tackle Bryan Robinson(notes) concluded, moral victories don't count in the standings. "I feel just as bad as our offense feels right now ... I think we gave up like 150 yards rushing today; that doesn't sound too impressive to me. And then, Pete Carroll called off the dogs at the end - that was a classy move by him."

"Beast Mode" did continue to a degree, with running back Marshawn Lynch(notes) continuing his physical style and finishing up with 89 yards on 24 carries and longest run of 39 yards. Lynch continued to surprise with his ability to bounce outside on zone slides, though he humorously accused this writer of "stereotyping" him with such notions.

"Why? Why would they be surprised? They made an assumption," he said jokingly. "Why are you making me one-dimensional? No, it's just a read, you know. If everything is clogged up inside, why not run outside? It's just basically what the defense gives you; you've just got to capitalize on it."

The biggest star of the day on offense, both literally and figuratively, was receiver Mike Williams, whose story of reclamation continues at a breakneck pace. He led all receivers on both sides with 11 catches on 16 targets for 89 yards and a touchdown in which he seemed to defy the laws of physics in the way he could adjust his body to the ball and stay on bounds in the end zone.

"On the sidelines in front of us on a back-shoulder throw; a great one," Carroll said. "Down in close, there was another great grab with guys all over him. He played tough, he played physically, and he came through in a big way. That's becoming a really solid aspect of our offense, and I'm really fired up for Mike."

But of course, Mare took the day's honors overall. Kicking is a game of mindset to a great degree, and the man who was thrown under the bus a year ago by former head coach and current broadcaster Jim Mora brought that mindset to this game.

"The good thing for us is (after all the penalties) is that you keep getting reps on that hash, so you can kind of get into a groove ... I guess it's like a quarterback throwing a lot - you get in a rhythm," Mare said. "It's no different for us. We get that feeling and that confidence. I just do my job and don't worry about anybody else. We can just get it going."

That's a pretty good summary of a Seahawks team that continues to win improbably and unpredictably, with a seemingly ever-changing cast that requires a program at all times. The concept of "winning ugly" is a canard -- in this NFL, you take wins however you can get them. Especially when you're finding your way on a team that's seen so few of them recently.

Related: , Cameron Morrah, Marshawn Lynch, Kurt Warner, Derek Anderson, Max Hall, Arizona Cardinals, Dallas Cowboys, New Orleans Saints


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Five clear pieces of evidence to prove Miami recovered the fumble

Referee Gene Steratore said he didn't award the Miami Dolphins the football after Ben Roethlisberger's(notes) controversial fumble on Sunday because there wasn't "clear evidence of the [Dolphins] recovering the ball." Well, Gene, here are some crystal-clear pieces of evidence for you:

The ball is loose and there are three players in this screenshot that appear to have a chance at the ball: No. 58 Karlos Dansby(notes), No. 59 Ikaika Alama-Francis(notes) (middle) and No. 94 Randy Starks(notes) (right). All those players are wearing white jerseys. You can see Roethlisberger to the right of Alama-Francis, crouched down at the goal line. 

Two Dolphins have their hands on it; Alama-Francis and Starks. Pittsburgh's Flozell Adams(notes) has now seen the ball and is jumping over Alama-Francis in an attempt to grab it. Roethlisberger is even more out of position before, but his hand is making a stab at it. 

Now, chaos. Pittsburgh's Jonathan Scott(notes) (No. 72) is in on the scrum too (his is the white-gloved hand adjacent to Alama-Francis' helmet. If only there were a picture taken from a different angle to see what was really going on underneath.

Thank you, Alan Diaz of the Associated Press. Alama-Francis has the ball, while Starks' black-gloved hand is also on it. All of the other Steelers are out of position to get it. Roethlisberger's hand is on Starks' arm. No shot that Big Ben recovered that fumble.

Pretty clear the Dolphins ended up with the ball, right? Perhaps, but it's not indisputable. If this was the only evidence, Steratore was right to award the ball to the team that fumbled it. But it's not the only piece of clear evidence. The biggest one is below:

As we pointed out Sunday, the Dolphins came out of the pile with the ball. I drew a helpful circle in case that you, like Gene Steratore, couldn't see the ball.

There it is. Clear as day. Steelers fans will say that the play was over, so it didn't matter who recovered the ball. Nonsense. Steratore didn't say that he gave Pittsburgh the ball because the play was over, he said he did it because there was no evidence to suggest it didn't recover the ball. Well, there's your evidence.

Regardless, as you can see in this picture, other officials are sorting out the mess in the pile while Steratore rushed to rule it a touchdown. They were still involved in the play. You know the players involved were fighting for the ball like it was still alive. What else did Steratore need?

The Dolphins got hosed on that call. Steratore didn't lose them the game; they did a good job of that on their own by failing to get in the end zone on two drives in the first quarter that started inside the Pittsburgh 25. But the officials didn't help matters by chickening out and falling back on the rulebook instead of applying common sense. 

H/T to The Daily Dolphin and my old Churchill Observer colleague, Ben Volin, for the idea for this post.

Related: Ben Roethlisberger, Miami Dolphins


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Video: Saints player injures chain-gang official during punt return

All week, the NFL focused on the danger of players hitting players. After a frightening incident in New Orleans, the league may be forced to consider the danger of players hitting officials.

During punt-return coverage in his team's loss to the Cleveland Browns, New Orleans Saints special teamer Courtney Roby(notes) plowed into a member of the chain gang while in a full sprint. Al Nastaci, who was standing a few feet from the field while holding a first-down marker, fell hard to the ground after Roby shoved him with both hands. The official appeared to hit his head in the process.

He was immediately attended to by medical personnel and was wheeled out of the Superdome on a stretcher after a 15-minute delay. Adam Schefter of ESPN reports that Nastaci was diagnosed with a mild concussion and will remain hospitalized overnight. He is expected to be fine.  


Roby was assessed a 15-yard unsportsmanlike conduct penalty for running out of bounds. It wouldn't be surprising if he and his NFL peers received a memo this week on the proper places to run during kick returns.

Related: Cleveland Browns, New Orleans Saints


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